That Wasn’t on the Map

Kayla Howard Self Care 1 Comment

That Wasn't on the Map
by Kayla Howard

Expectations: those visual pictures and plans for the future that don’t always materialize. 

I prepared to go camping this weekend with plenty of expectations. I expected to sit in the woods and sip coffee by a camp fire.  I expected to go hiking and show my kids some of the places I loved to visit when I was their age.  And, I expected to be camping until Sunday afternoon.

Reality didn’t look anything like that.

Truly, it was a shock when things started unraveling.  I’ve always had a wonderful time camping and had no reason to expect any different on this occasion.
The weekend started out with a “bang”, — meaning, the “bang” of my head beating against the wall as I tried to think of all the things I needed to pack.  I tried to make sure things were ready for my coaching clients (I LOVE being there for them all the time so I was a little worried about leaving), and to make sure that fun stuff was ready for my Facebook wall.   The kids and I ran around for hours scrambling to get everything we needed.

Finally, a little later than I’d hoped, we made it to the campground to discover that, — this one’s taken, that one’s taken… oh goodness… I hope there is a campsite that is NOT taken.

We took the second to last remaining campsite, and the last site was snatched right behind us.  Then we set to work unloading. 

The first thing I missed was the plates.  So I hiked myself to the top of the hill and after several attempts, found just enough cell service to push a text message to my husband, “tell John I forgot the plates.”

My girlfriend and I unloaded everything, then played at the water with the kids until our husbands arrived.  We had a nice hot-dog roast, fun visit and finally hit the lumpy, hard ground sometime after 11 pm.

On Saturday morning things began falling short of expectation.  My husband woke up looking terrible.  That’s not normal for him, especially camping.  We both love camping.  After breakfast, he wanted to go back to bed, but we went down to the swimming hole and let the kids swim.  Our friends left around lunch time and we settled in for our second afternoon and what we had planned to be another night.  However, my husband got sicker.  He laid in the tent, laid in the pickup, and lounged in the chair but couldn’t do anything else. 

Finally I said, "you know, we need to take you home. Obviously you are not well and you are not going to get the rest you need on this fabulously hard ground."  He admitted that he needed to go, — and our disappointed, but brave kiddos helped us pack up camp. 

This was really not part of the plan.  I had wanted to take the kids to the giant white pine tree, and I had planned to do a video for you there.  I had planned to eat several more s'mores, and had planned to have some relaxing quiet time.  Instead, I had to pack everything, — and in less than 24 hours had to repack and unpack it all.  To top it off, those things I had prepared for my Facebook wall, — ya well, they didn't post for some reason.  Sigh. Those expectations!

Just two hours after we made it home (I had put on a fun movie for the kids and done a Raindrop therapy on my husband), a huge lightning and rain storm hit.  It poured down rain and put on quite a display of lightning.  It was then that we all said, “good thing we came home!”

Since you are all people, I’m sure you’ve experienced the disappointment of unmet expectations.  Maybe you “expected” T-Tapp to work faster, “expected” it to take more off your waist than you calves, or “expected” to lose actual pounds.

The tricky thing about expectations is that they are just a proposed reality.   Often they are based on past experience and can be an exceptionally close guess, but they are still not reality because we are dealing with what might happen in the future. 
We have talked about the importance of having a vision, and part of having a vision is seeing what you'd like to do in the future.  Having expectations is not a bad thing.  What is important is having the ability to quickly make adjustments to plans and being open enough to evaluate what needs to change.
Let's put it back in the context of not losing weight as fast you thought you should.  It would be wrong so say, "T-Tapp doesn't work."  The most logical thing to do would be to evaluate whether or not you have physical hindrances and to be humble enough to admit that muscle activation isn't making sense to your body just yet.

In our case this weekend, we were actually quite blessed that because we came home from camping, we attended a great church service and had a fun and uplifting fellowship with friends at a picnic afterwards.  In fact, I’m so glad that Sunday happened how it did vs how I expected it to happen.

I would, in fact, go so far as to say that God had a plan in it for us.  It worked out for good.

So whether your expectations fell short because God had a better plan or you need to make more reasonable expectations, tell me what you learned from a similar experience.

a Do You Rub Your Belly At Night?Kayla Howard is a stay at home wife and homeschooling mom who loves to teach the T-Tapp method of staying fit in 15 minutes a day from the comfort of your own home.  She is a  Biblical Health Coach and Senior T-Tapp Trainer, certified to teach all forms of T-Tapp.  If you'd like to know more about becoming and staying fit and healthy, Kayla is happy to answer your questions!  Visit her website: or Send an email to:

Comments 1

  1. I can totally relate, Kayla! 
    It wasn't so much that I was expecting greater results from my June kickoff to t-tapp.  The inches lost were very encouraging.  But I was expecting to see a corresponding weight loss.  It is hard not to tie results to weight loss, because we have been conditioned to use weight as the success indicator.   I've appreciated very much your perspective from past blog postings about letting go the unrealistic expectations of regaining the 'body of our youth'.   Trying to be open to whatever God has in store and to enjoy and delight in the journey.

    I so appreciate the way you manage to hit the heart of things as you share your thoughts, and am so blessed by time spent with you in cyber space or IRL!

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